Interesting discussion amongst all of you.  I have found an
alternative solution that, while somewhat impractical (particularly for
the sane), involves sparklers, small nuclear devices and alien
spacecraft.  If you can use the sparklers to ignite the small nuclear
devices, it seems that you will be followed by fairly high luminosity
alien spacecraft.  Seems to me that should be superior to all solutions
mentioned previously.......

See
http://www.foxnews.com/scitech/2010/09/23/aliens-monitoring-nukes-worry-ex-air-force-officers/

for more information

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